6 Months In

Last Thursday marked the 6 month anniversary of our move to New Mexico. I found it ironic that I spent that day in Ohio and New York with my extended family...

6 months in...In some ways those 6 months have flown by. In other ways it seems like those same 6 months of crawled by. I am still awed by the beauty of this space. I find myself catching my breath every time I head out the front door to take a walk or to jog and see the Organ Mountains. They are majestic and beautiful and remind me over and over again of why I love living in Las Cruces. They also remind me of how simple life really needs to be, and how crazily complicated I make it. I am thankful for this ever constant reminder to simplify and slow down.

Bob is doing wonderful. He loves his job. He works hard and is appreciated by his employer. It is nice to see him happy.

I am doing well too. I have met a wonderful eclectic group of people hear in Las Cruces. They are all amazing and keep me on my toes. I feel very welcome in this community and it has embraced me with open arms. I am finding that my mom coined this place best when she said that life feels like a vacation here. In many ways I would venture to say that this statement is true. Yet there are still the daily mundane tasks of life and the busyness of having 4 active children that make it also seem like real life. I find it hard to balance both of those mindsets. A lot of the time I will get caught up in the busyness of having an active family and trying to maintain a home and also trying to work on myself. I have to physically stop myself and pause reminding myself that I am only going to live in this beautiful state for so long - I better make the most of it and learn what it has to teach me - this brings me (momentarily) into my relaxed vacation mode. I need to learn to live in that relaxed place more often.

I have found a church that I like a lot. I have been going to church pretty consistently since I have moved down here and have attended several church services. The church I picked is perfect for me and I look forward to see where this new journey takes me.

The weather here is making such a big difference in my mood. The almost constant sun is a blessing. The beautiful big blue skies are a gift that only an Ohioan can truly appreciate after dealing with months and months of mostly dreary gray skies. As I sat on the airplane in Cleveland getting ready to take off to begin my journey home it was a rare beautiful day in Cleveland. The sky was blue. The sun was shining. The grass was green. Spring was in the air. Tears filled my eyes as I sat on the runway because I wanted this so much to be the way it was most of the time. Then I wouldn't feel the need to be away. Then I could go home to my little tan house with green shutters with friends and family nearby. But I knew all too well that this was not the way Cleveland is...my memory reminded me quickly of how dreary and depressed I was living under the Ohio weather pattern when I flew into Ohio the week before and landed in a snow flurry at the end of April for Pete's sake! I need the New Mexican weather like a drug addict needs their next fix. I crave the sunshine in a way that is almost borderline neurotic. Feeling the warm sun on my face makes me happy. Deeply and truly happy.

The girls are doing great. They have made their own friends here and I am happy that they are settling in nicely. Sarah misses her two friends (and their families) from Ohio very much, but she is not letting those feelings stop her from thriving down here. I am happy for that. Elizabeth and I have made some great strides the last couple of days in terms of her behavior. I have implemented a 'one and done' policy with her. What this means is that after I ask/tell her to do something she gets one reminder and if she has not complied she will be punished. Sometimes punishment is writing sentences. Other times it is spending time in her room. Sometimes it means saying no to having an extra treat. etc....I am also trying to spend more quality time with her. When she talks to me I stop what I am doing and really listen to her and watch her instead of merely acknowledging her presence with a head nod of some sort and then continuing on with what I am doing while she talks to me. I am also following through every time with what I say I am going to do with her whether it is an activity and something fun or a correction of her behavior. I have always been very consistent with my older 3 children and less consistent with her and it shows. I have walked myself into a corner and getting her on the path of good behavior will take me a bit longer because I did not start out demanding good behavior from the get go. I took the easy way with her and now I am paying for it in spades. So consistency, quality time, and follow through are my key objectives with her right now. I have seen improvement already and I am optimistic that we can make some changes here. I will make sure to honor her personality while still expecting top notch behavior.

Josh  also seems to be handling the move pretty well.  Now that the spring is present (kind of) in Ohio he thinks a lot about how his buddies are most likely up at Bolich playing soccer with one other and it makes him sad. I can understand that. He has found some new buddies on his soccer team that he is hopeful will eventually make up a new fab 5 like he had back in Ohio with Boorman, Logan, Andy, Michael, and himself.  He is anxious to get back on the field again and going to each practice and game since his injury is damn near killing him. He cannot be away from the game because that would destroy him, but he also cannot be near the game because that bums him out too right now. But he is a teammate and it is extremely important to Bob and I he behave as one even if he cannot play by attending practices and games. He is in physical therapy three times a week and is making improvements in mobility and flexibility in his right knee. Our goal is to keep him from having his leg muscle atrophy so that he can get back on the field once he is cleared.

Andy is struggling. He confirmed this morning to Bob and I that he is struggling a bit with some depression. He says that he feels very lonely and sad to be here sometimes. I had no idea this transition was as hard as it has been on him. He is such an easy going kid and so easy to parent that I had no idea (beyond what I have already mentioned on this blog) that he was having such a rough go at it. Bob and I are going to work extra hard to help him. I think that being on this new Rio Rapids team (should he make it) will help. I also think that having some of Josh's buddies over more will help too as they seem to be more up Andy's alley than the boys his age in terms of the amount of things he has in common with them. I know that Andy misses the Boorman family and Paige very much. I don't know how to help him other than to make sure that Bob and I are spending more quality time with him. I talked with him about his level of sadness and loneliness and he assured me that it was not too bad and that there were times when he enjoys living here, but sometimes he feels depressed. Bob and I will do everything we can to help him, but we also know that he has to want to help himself too. He has a birthday coming up next week so we are trying to make extra cool for him. I need to work on being a better parent to him. I think that would help.

So that is about it. I am in the beginning stages of planning our summer trip back to Ohio/NY and am looking forward to seeing all of those whom we haven't seen since January. Hopefully, we can make the rounds and see all of those that were a part of our Ohio life.

Paying It Forward - An Unexpected Gift

The unexpected box that found its way to my doorstep a few weeks ago had a profound affect on me. As much as I loved the contents inside the box what I loved most was the feeling that I felt upon receiving a box of gifts - just for me - for no good reason other than to celebrate me. A box of love.

That box changed me. I know that may sound so silly, but it did. The thought crept into my mind that I should do this for someone else. Then that thought morphed into the idea that I wanted to do this for a lot of other people. I want to give other people the chance to feel the wonderful emotions that I had when I received this box. And I hope that, when the time is right for the recipient, that she will pay it forward to someone in her life.

I decided that I am going to send my boxes the women in my life first and then add men (if need be later). I feel that a lot of the time we women do a terrible job supporting one another and uniting with one another. We all have so much in common despite our differences. I feel strongly that sending these boxes will greatly strengthen the ties that I have not only with these women, but will help to strengthen the ties that those women have with the women in their lives.

I purchased the items today for my first unsuspecting gal today, and I was so excited!!! I cannot wait to paint my box (because that painted box on my doorstep was just as magical as the contents inside) and ship out the goodies I have purchased tomorrow. As much fun as it was to receive those goodies for myself, the act of giving new goodies away to someone else is infinitely more exciting.

And so it will continue. Every couple of months (as I can save up the money to do so) I will send out a new box to someone in my life. Some of the recipients will be people that I know very well and are near and dear to my heart. Some of my recipients will be those whom I do not know very well, but think that a box of love would be much needed.

I know that some of the these boxes items will be spot on. For others, I may give a gift or two that the recipient has absolutely no use for (despite my thoughts that maybe she could use the item). I think this will especially be the case with those that I am going to send boxes to that I do not know very well.

I have my first box ready to go. I also know who my second recipient is going to be already. Other than that I have no idea who I am going to send a box to. I have a feeling that a person will come on my radar at just the right time, so I am not worrying about anything beyond this first box.

Who would have known that something so simple could make such an impact on me? Who would have known that I will be taking this simple idea built on love and paying it forward to so many unsuspecting women. I never knew that the gift and the act of giving is a gift not only to the recipient, but also to the one doing the giving. I am truly blessed and I am so excited!!!! Let the giving begin!!!!

Nutrition Revisited

I know it has been a while since I have posted about my nutrition journey. Part of this reason was that  I had no idea what I was getting into and part of it was because I am a busy mom and had to set it aside for a while. But since I am changing the way I view food and losing weight I thought I should bring the subject to the forefront of my life again. 

When I began this journey I wasn't looking for diets or pills or anything like that. I was looking for what nutrients, vitamins, and minerals my body needs, how much of those things it needed, and where I could get them from. I found a lot of information online, but my main source of information actually came from the USDA food guidelines. I was quite surprised actually that I found such (what I consider) honest information. I thought that there would be a lot of weight given to foods that come from sources with government ties such as the meat and dairy industry. I was surprised when I was reading through the many pages of the food guidelines that there was no leading information telling me that I must eat meat and dairy or else I was going to deprive my body of nutrients it needs. I was also surprised to read the words 'nutrient dense' over and over in the food guidelines and how much it was trying deter people from eating processed foods.  I was even more surprised to find dietary guidelines for both vegetarians and vegans. 

Because I am trying to lose weight I have chosen to eat around 1800 calories a day. Based on this number this is the minimum amount of nutrients in order to be at optimum health.

Protein - 46 g

Carbohydrates - 130 g

Fiber - 25 g

Fats - 40 - 70 g

Minerals

Calcium - 1000 mg

Iron - 18 mg

Magnesium - 320 mg

Phosphorus - 700 mg

Potassium - 4700 mg

Sodium - <2300 mg

Zinc - 8 mg

Copper - 900 mcg

Selenium - 55 mcg

Vitamins

A - 700 mcg

D - 15 mcg

E - 15 mg

C - 75 mg

Thiamin - 1.1 mg

Riboflavin - 1.1 mg

Niacin - 14 mg

Folate - 400 mcg

B6 - 13 mg

B12 - 2.4 mcg

Choline - 425 mg

K - 90 mcg

So how does this translate into a typical day right now for me?

Today I ate the following food:

2 Tbsp Almond Milk

1 Cup Coffee

1 Piece of Ezekial Sprouted Wheat Bread

1 Tbsp Natural Peanut Butter

1 Granny Smith Apple

1 Banana

2 Carrots

1 Cup of Strawberries

1 Package of Frozen Spinach

1 Whole Wheat Bun

1 Shiitake Mushroom Garden Burger 

1/4 Cup of Almonds

(Normally I eat a bit more per day, but I had a busy day with soccer games and was not home for most of the afternoon.)

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Here are the nutrient totals for all of the above items:

Protein - 30 g 

Carbohydrates - 293 g

Fiber - 40 g

Fat - 40 g

Calcium - 450 mg

Iron - 9.36 mg

Magnesium - 12.8 mg

Phosphorus - 0 mg

Potassium - 2328 mg

Sodium - 1227 mg

Zinc - 1.12 mg

Copper - 0 mg

Selenium - 0 mg

Vitamin A - 4039 mg

Vitamin D - 0 mg 

Vitamin E - 6 mg

Vitamin C - 166.5 mg

Thiamin - 0 mg

Riboflavin - 0 mg

Folate - 40 mcg

Niacin - .84 mg

B6 - .52 mg

B12 - 0 mcg

Choline - 0 mg

Vitamin K - 0 mcg

I have a lot of work to do to eat an optimal diet in some areas, but in others today was a good day. I am most likely going to start taking a B -Complex supplement because I cannot ever see myself reaching my daily B vitamin requirement being a vegan. I was surprised when looking over my nutrient intake for today how much protein I ate. Most people question whether vegans get enough protein in their diet since they do not eat meat/milk products and most people would assume that that is where most protein consumption occurs. (I know that I thought this for a while.) The fact is that I will be just fine as I learn (over time) how to eat optimally. I am curious (but will never know) what my dietary nutritional intake looked like on my standard american diet. I definitely feel better since becoming a vegan again. I know that this lifestyle does not work for most people, but it certainly works for me. 

The last thing that I researched was how much of each food group should I be consuming on a daily or weekly basis in order to reach the USDA's guidelines for a vegan. 

Here is what I found (and am going to try my hardest to incorporate into my life) This is based on a diet of 1800 calories per day:

Fruits

 1 1/2 cups/daily

Veggies

2 1/2 cups/daily

(This is broken down even further):

Dark-Green Veggies: 1 1/2 cup/week

Red & Orange Veggies: 5 1/2 cups/week

Beans & Peas (Legumes): 1 1/2 cups/week

Starchy Veggies: 5 cups/week

Other Veggies: 4 c/week

Grains - Whole

6 oz daily

Protein Foods 

5 oz/daily

(Also broken down further)

 Beans & Peas: 12 oz/week

Soy Products: 9 oz/week

Nuts & Seeds: 14 oz/week

Dairy (vegan)

 3 cups/daily

Oils 

16 g /daily

It is going to take me while to build up to eating this way because I am really just learning about nutrition. I know that there are many ways of eating out there, but this is what I feel most comfortable trying to attain. It is going to take me a while to learn which foods will help me to obtain the daily minimum requirements especially in the vitamins and minerals part of my diet. I am confident though that I can get there with a lot of patience, education, and time. 

***Most of this information game from the USDA guidelines and caloriecount.com*** 

A Birthday

Tomorrow Bob will turn 36. In some respects that seems so young. In others it seems so old. We have now shared 18 birthdays together. Our first birthday together was Bob's 19th. It was our freshman year at college - we had only been dating for about 7 months, but were two peas in a pod even back then. He had gone out to dinner with his parents while I stayed back at the dorm creating a poster for him that celebrated all of our many memories together. That,  along with a couple of gifts, were what I had set up for him when he got back from dinner. Who would have known back then that that was the first of many, many birthdays we would share?

Bob is my rock. He is my anchor in stormy waters. He is my pot of gold at the end of a rainbow. Along with my children, he is quite simply, my everything. I wouldn't choose to live this life without him (even when he is driving me completely bonkers).

Tomorrow we will celebrate the day in the way that is typical of him. He has chosen to have a quiet day with the kids and me. First thing in the morning he and I are going to hike Picacho Mountain together. Then we will have a hearty breakfast, grab the kids, and will be taking a drive up to Hatch to check out the town and this great restaurant he heard about. We will have lunch there and then drive home to spend the rest of the afternoon here at the house. He will be grilling some steaks for dinner and we will have a campfire at night. It will be a simple day filled with love and laughter. Just as he would like.

Happy Birthday, Bobby!

Easter Sunday

Easter Sunday was quiet around here. In the morning the kids checked out their baskets and we had an egg hunt.  We had a nice dinner in the evening. It was simple, but very relaxing. 

Waiting to see what the Easter bunny brought them. (The boys are so excited to be up so early.)

Checking out their treats.

He is always so goofy!

Doing her best to find the eggs on her own with a quiet determination. 

 It was nice to be able to swim on Easter Sunday this year. Never thought in a million years I would be doing that!

I think that this walkway to our back yard is so pretty. There are purple flower blossoms hidden among the greenery. 

Love In A Box

This morning started out as a morning like most others.  I was taking Bob to work around noon (as he just began to work second shift a few days ago) and saw the most colorful packages I have ever seen sitting in front of my home. At first I was stumped as to who these beautiful packages could be from. I am expecting a package from Amazon and from Old Navy, but surely I knew that these boxes were not from either of these retailers. These boxes were decorated with love and it seemed to be pouring out of them. Upon closer inspection I saw that they were from an aunt and two cousins of mine. The packaging made sense once I saw who the gift giver was as she always sends my mom the most unique and amazing packages along with her thoughtful gifts. But still, I wondered, what could she possibly be sending to me? You see one of the boxes was addressed to my children. That was understandable. I figured that her kids had made something for mine. (And in way they did - as their box contained maple syrup that they most likely tapped themselves or knew of the family that tapped it.) But the other box? The bigger box? Well, that box was addressed solely to me.  What, I wondered, could she possibly have sent me?

 Inside this box were items beyond my wildest imagination. It was filled with love.  It was box whose contents said, "I hear you. I get you. I support you. I know where you are coming from. I know where you are trying to go." It was filled with amazing thoughtful, just truly perfect gifts for me. And the whole box was mine. A whole box of gifts - perfectly suited gifts! - just for me.!!! And sent to me just because! It isn't Christmas. It isn't my birthday. It is just some random ordinary day in my life.  That doesn't happen to me very often. In fact, I would venture to say that it doesn't happen to most of us very often. I think it is rare to get a gift that encapsulates all that we are and what we need exactly in that moment of our lives. Often we just purchase gifts to have something to give someone not really knowing what the recipient really needs or wants.

Inside this box were: books on knitting, a self help book, great magazines on a variety of subjects, a journal with a pen, some of my favorite tea with honey and a beautiful mug (with the inscription of Cornwall, CT - which happens to be the town in which the gift giver resides.), some bath salts, a beautiful labyrinth, candle holder with candles that burns essential oil, essential oils, tea light candles, lotion and chapstick, two chocolate bars, a gift card for itunes (so that I could download some music to rock out to), some inspirational cards, an incense stick, and a note.

 It rare that a gift can not only put a smile on ones face, but also in their heart. This gift put a smile in my heart. It was an amazingly perfect gift filled with perfect things and love. I am even more amazed at the gift box because the sender just bought a home (and I know how much money goes into doing that), is in school taking some college classes, and homeschooling her two young sons (among other things). Her life is very busy, so the fact that she took the time to put together such a perfect box filled with so many just awesome gifts meant the world to me.

 I really am blessed. Thank you, Missy, for putting together a package filled with love. You made my day. You made my week. You made me smile. Your gift - your thoughtfulness - meant the world to me. You touched my heart - for that I am grateful.

I will treasure and cherish the contents of this box and will think of you  as I consume these items. They will make me smile. They will make me feel loved.  I don't know if you will ever know how much this unexpected gift meant to me. I hope someday you find on your doorstep the kind of love I found on mine today.

What Our School Days Look Like Now

I have been homeschooling for a while. Two years this time. Two years my first time. A total of four years. I am not quite a veteran, but I am not a newbie either. I guess you could say that I am a betweener. What I do know is this: I have tried just about every kind of homeschooling there is. We have done online schooling (K12). We have done one curriculum for all subjects (Lifepac). I have tried out the Classical Method of homeschooling. (Think Susan Bauer Wise.) We have even tried unschooling. (Think John Holt.) I have tried (and am currently settled on) an eclectic version of schooling that molds a little bit of this with a little bit of that and allows us to create a completely unique educational setting just for us.

Homeschooling families are no different than those who wage the public verse private school battles. We can be very critical of one another and how each chooses to educate their children from home. I have heard and read unschoolers say unkind things about those who choose to do book work with their children. I have heard and read of families who choose to learn by textbooks say unkind things about unschoolers. To me, it doesn't matter how one learns - as long as the learning that is taking place is in the best interests of each individual child and their family structure. I have seen some amazing unschoolers and their children thriving in their environment. I have seen some families who choose the "schooling at home" method (as it is sometimes - usually negatively - referred to by others) as excellent examples of what homeschooling - learning - should look like. On the flip side - I have seen the worst in all different types of homeschooling styles too. I have witnessed those families that my public/private school friends use as examples of all that is wrong with homeschooling and why it shouldn't be allowed.

I have always tried to do what is best for my kids at each stage in their learning seasons. Some seasons minimal book work has been done because there were so many other learning opportunities around. Other seasons we have used book work as our means of education because it is what has made the most sense to both Bob and I, but also to them. The greatest gift that homeschooling offers is that it allows a family to change their flow to fit the family's needs at any given time in its life. I have never doubted (at least not for very long) that the whole entire time my children have been homeschooled  they have been learning and growing and becoming the people they are meant to be - even when the days might not look like what their peers look like.

At this stage in our homeschooling journey we have found a happy medium. No longer am I stressing out over getting each subject done for each of the kids. Nor are we allowing our days to be completely unstructured. Instead I sat down with them and asked them which subjects they felt that they should be doing. I also told them that I would allow them to do each subject as often as they would like to during the week. I wanted to give the kids a choice in how their education looked to them because I know (from experience) that if I demand that they do 'x' subject 'x' times a week and they don't want to do it - it will become hell for both me and the child in question. I was surprised by the subjects the kids chose to do. I thought for sure they would only do a couple of subjects a couple of days a week with independent learning sprinkled in here and there.  We have been on this schedule for many weeks and it is working very well. Instead this is what they chose:

Andy

Math - M, T, W, Th

Science - T, Th

History - M, T, W, Th

Logic - T, W

Cursive - M, T, W, Th

Spelling - M, T, W, Th

Writing - M, W 

(with a paper due every other Friday)

Grammar - M, Th

Josh

Math - M, T, W, Th

Science - M, W

History - M, T, W, Th

Logic - T, Th

Latin - T, Th

Spelling - M, T, W, Th

Writing - T, Th 

(with a paper due every other Friday)

Grammar - M, W

Braille - M, T, Th

Sarah

Math - T, Th

Science - M, W

History - M, T, W, Th

Logic - T, Th

Latin - T, Th

Spelling - T, Th

Writing - M, W 

(with a paper due every other Friday)

Grammar - M, W

Braille - M, T, Th

Elizabeth

Math - M, T, Th

Science - M, T, W, Th

History - M, T, W, Th

Spelling - M, T, W

Grammar - T, Th

A few notes:

Sarah uses her braille writer to write her papers. I copy her essays down for her on paper as she tells me word for word what to write. Then I read the paper back to her and (after making corrections with her)  she uses the braille writer to "write" her paper. (She is currently working on a paper on presidents. I will write up a blog and show you what her papers look like.)

I also read Sarah her other assignments and she repeats back to me the answers. So for math - I will read the lesson to her and then go through each question. She will recite the answers and then I will write them down for her in her notebook. (I have heard that there are math books in braille, but we are no where near that stage yet, so we will continue on as we are.)

Elizabeth will be picking up more subjects as she goes on to fourth grade. For now, the five that she has keep her plenty busy.

We use a 4 day school week so that the kids can have Friday to catch up if something came up on a particular day during the week and they aren't able to get to something. (This happens rarely, but it is nice to have this type of flexibility.)

This system works like a charm because they kids know what they are to do each day. They don't fuss because they picked out what they wanted their schedule to look like and I don't freak out because I am no longer trying to tackle each subject with each kid each school day. I am confident that they have the best of both worlds - both the academic rigor that I feel is important for them to have - and the flexibility that is what makes homeschooling so cool. (Oh, and I get to have these 4 amazing beings with me every day.)

We have found a huge homeschooling community here in Las Cruces. It is nice because we have so many activities to choose from and so many different types of families to exposed to. The longer we live here the more things we find out about. Right now we are involved in two books clubs and a couple of park days where the kids get to just hang out and play with one another. There is also a co-op I am thinking about joining in the fall that will give my kids even more opportunities both social and educational to broaden their horizons. It has been a blessing to say the least.

So, there you have it. That is what our school day looks like.

Random Pics on this Easter Sunday

Happy Easter! I hope you all will be spending your day with loved ones. We will be hanging out as a family here enjoying a quite day with nothing to do. I am making homemade cinnamon buns for brunch along with bacon. We will be having a Easter egg hunt followed by some swimming this afternoon. (We will be using the solar heater for a couple of hours to pump warm water into the pool as the temps are quite chilly in the water without it.) We will then be having an Easter feast with rigatoni, homemade sauce, homemade meatballs, homemade french bread, broccoli, and salad. I will be busy for a couple of hours this afternoon in the kitchen, but the effort will be worth it. 

Both my brother and sister-in-law and my mother visited in the month of March. It was really awesome to have them all come down and it meant a lot to me and my family to be able to show them where we live. I think everyone had a good time.

I leave you with some random pics from the last few weeks....

Uncle Beaver with Andy and Elizabeth on top of 'A' mountain.

Soledad Canyon - on a part of the trail I hadn't been on before. 

Soledad Canyon

Taking a break from hiking under this lone tree on the trail. 

An (old?) sign we found on the trail. We really are in the Wild West!

An amazing stone house that is just sitting in the middle of nowhere at the back of the trail. There is no information about the home which leads one to use his/her imagination as to what purpose it could have possibly served. 

Storm coming up the mountain range.

Waterfall at the back of the trail about an hour walk from the trailhead.

Uncle Beaver trying to prove that he can still take down his nephews....

And failing miserably in proving his point....Looks like Andy (and the other two kids) wins!!

After losing a bet to Andy Uncle Beaver is getting ready to be thrown into the icy waters of the pool. 

The deal was though that in order to get Uncle Beaver into the water Andy had to throw him in...

Success!

That water is cold!!!!!

Mountain view from our roof. 

Sunset from the backyard.

Andyman and his Nana at White Sands National Park.

Random horse riders at White Sands.

Organ Mountains

Cow grazing on the side of the road.

Organ Mountains

Out to dinner with Nana at a VERY cool restaurant. 

In Mesilla town square.