For some time before our dinner out I had been restless. There were things that I felt were out of sync in my life, but I couldn't put my finger on what or how to change it. I knew that I was unhappy with a lot of things - the way I parented, the way I took care of my home, my weight and diet, my smoking habit, etc...I had felt uncomfortable in my life - I knew that I wasn't living authentically, but I also knew that I was uncertain that I had the strength to live my life in accordance with the Truth of my soul. We talked about everything and nothing in particular during dinner with my friend, but I knew that I had found another kindred spirit in her, and more importantly I found a sounding board to go to when I had questions or concerns in the area of parenting or anything else for that matter. Just knowing that I had someone to turn to - who truly understood my struggles to make good sound authentic decisions was enough to catapult me to make some major changes. I have a lot of people in my life that I can turn to for certain things, but only a small handful of people that I would turn to for anything - she is one of them.Sometimes a person needs to feel that someone else believes in them in order to be able to find the strength to believe in themselves. She was that someone for me.
In the past year I have:
Become a vegan.
Lost 35lbs.
Started this blog.
Stopped biting my nails.
Became less of a critic of myself.
Lived apart from my husband while he was on a job assignment for work for 7.5 months.
Lived as a single parent (Sunday night - Friday night) while my husband was away for 7.5 months.
Realized that I am an incredibly strong woman.
Became a better mother.
Scheduled tubal reversal surgery (which is May 17th for anyone who is wondering).
Decided to consider home schooling my 4 kids.
Stopped smoking, stopped smoking again, and REALLY stopped smoking.
Started to read the bible from cover to cover
Regained the strength to live my life authentically.
Realized that dreams do come true.
Realized that my husband loves me more than I ever knew possible.
Realized I am the heart of my home.
Fell in love with the spirit of Christmas all over again.
Fell more in love with my husband than I thought possible.
Realized that I really hate politics - especially school politics...
This year was the best year of my adult life. Hands down. It was also one of the hardest years of my life. I do not want to ever live the year over again, but I am so grateful that I went through all that I did. I felt more aware of my life in the past year than I have at any other time. I cried more than I have and fought more for the things that were truly important to me than I ever had before.
I never would have imagined 1 year ago, that I would be prepping to try and have another baby, and that I would be looking into home schooling my kids. I would have told you that you were crazy. Not because I didn't want another baby with all my heart back then, but because I never thought that my husband was actually going to agree to go through with the tubal reversal surgery. If you would have told me 1 year ago that I would actually become a vegan, and FINALLY lose some weight - I would not have believed you, but indeed both happened.
I look forward to seeing what this next year brings. I know that I will have experiences in this upcoming year that I would have never thought possible. My life is amazing, and I am so thankful for it.
My husband (as if he hasn't done enough for me already) has planned a special over night trip for the two of us to celebrate my 34th birthday. He already has a sitter lined up (thank you, mom) and that is all that I know. I have no idea where we are going or what we will be doing. I look forward to sharing the details of my birthday with you all.
Here's to another life changing year! Cheers!
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