A Matter of Perspective

Our circumstances, and what we make of them, really are a matter of perspective. I was reminded of this lesson a few weeks ago and then again this weekend. I know of a family in our community who has several children with series medical issues. I am talking about Sarah size medical issues multiple times over. I think about this family often, especially when I am feeling down in the dumps about Sarah's condition, because we are the lucky ones, my family and I.  I need to be reminded of that more than I would like to admit. We don't have several diseases we are battling - we have one. I (and we) are strong enough to handle one disease. I don't think I could handle more than one. I hope I never ever have to find out.  It would  behoove us to carry ourselves with grace and dignity because I imagine that this family (or any family with multiple children with medical issues) would give up a lot to be in our position. To some people, those maybe with no serious medical issues, might see our family situation as a curse. They might see our family situation as such a sadness. Me? I see it that way too sometimes, but then I think about those (and they exist) who have it worse off than us, and I am reminded that my family really doesn't have it that bad. A change in perspective makes all the difference in the world. It wasn't until  Sarah was diagnosed with MS that I realized how good we have it now. It wasn't until the dark days fell upon us that I was truly able to see how lucky we are.

The second situation that really brought about some serious thought was an evening out recently. I finally decided to stop hibernating (there will be another post about this in the future), and go back out into the world. I went out for a beer with some friends and heard some of the saddest stories I have ever heard. Stories about conflict and violence. Stories about family discord. I took these stories home with me and thought them over and over. I thought about how we all carry stories of sadness in our hearts and memories, and that no matter how sunny a person's disposition that sadness still exists deep within. I also thought about how lucky I truly am. I definitely have had sadness in my life, but really I have it pretty good. In fact, I have it really great. My kids have it even better. They have two parents who are completely involved in their lives who not only love them, but love each other. They have two parents who don't scream at each other and spew hateful words back and forth between them. My kids have never witnessed parental violence because it doesn't exist in their home.

The sadness that we have isn't born out of shame or hurt or violence or mistrust or lies - the sadness that we have is that our lives have been altered by a disease that could permanently negatively impact our daughter's/sister's life. That is a sadness, although I wish we didn't have to deal with it at all, is definitely manageable. It took a devastating illness to see that, but we still see it now none-the-less. Life truly is a matter of perspective. How I choose to see my situation in the world will affect not only how I live my life, but how my children live their lives. I know that sometimes there will be dark days, but over all I know deep inside that we are the lucky ones.