Some Updates on Sarah

I know that there are a lot of you out there who have shared our concern regarding Sarah's illness and I wanted to take some time to let all of you know how she is doing.

First and foremost, since moving down to New Mexico, Sarah has not been hospitalized one time. That in and of itself is a miracle as she was hospitalized around 11 times in the 17 months from the time she was diagnosed until we left Ohio in October of 2014.

Besides dealing with extreme exhaustion which is a common side effect of an autoimmune disease such as hers and her loss of vision she has no other symptoms of this incredibly horrible disease. That, too, is a miracle.

We have opted to just stick with her current doctor at the Cleveland Clinic for treatment as the medical community down here is not adequate to deal with the complexity of a disease such as Sarah's given its rareness in the adult population and even more rareness in the pediatric population. This decision was also made because her condition seems to have stabilized to the point that monthly medical intervention is no longer necessary. Had it been, I suppose we would have sought out treatment in El Paso, TX instead of here.

While still maintaining her prescribed medication Bob and I have decided to treat Sarah homeopathically as well. She began taking her remedy at the end of last week and we are hoping that the over the course of time both her energy will improve, and there is a chance (we are not sure how big of one) that she may be able to recover part of her vision. I don't know how much I buy into this type of treatment yet, but I figured that it current hurt to try. Sarah was on board with trying this type of treatment as the black dots that cloud her vision have been increasing as of late making it more difficult for her to get around in some instances.

We will be going back to Ohio the first two weeks of December and while there she will have a brain and spinal MRI which will last about 2 hours. (The Cleveland Clinic informed us that this procedure will cost $12000 and that we need to make sure our insurance company will cover it. How in the world can a two hour procedure cost $12000?!)  We will then have a follow up appointment with her doctor that works at the Mellen Center a few days after that to have the MRI read. If Sarah has no new lesions and if her lesions have healed themselves then Sarah will be taken off of her medication as it would appear that that risks of taking it would outweigh the benefits since her body would appear to be healing itself. I am going to assume that this is going to be the outcome because I don't know what I will do if there are more lesions presenting themselves on her brain or spinal cord.

As for the rest of her Sarah has mostly good days and a few bad days sprinkled in here and there. She seems to have found a deep love of music and Bob has taken her to 3 concerts in the last 5 weeks. I think that music helps her to feel "normal".  She loves audio books and is constantly listening to them. I have purchased several audio books for her and she also uses a website that provides free classic books in an audio version. She is currently obsessed with the Little House on the Prairie series and has listened to those 7 books over and over again despite having other options available. I read to her a lot as well. We are currently reading the Anne of Green Gables series.

The one area that I see her struggling in is the area of friendships. There are so many kids who she comes in contact with on a regular basis, but she has only opened herself up to a couple of them. When we are out and about at a park day or some other type of outing she will just sit by my side and not be very willing to go and meet new kids. It isn't that they aren't friendly or kind it just seems that she has developed an aversion for putting herself out there. My once outgoing girl has become very shy and withdrawn in new situations. It is a concern for me, and is one that I am working on, so hopefully with time she will learn to come out of her shell again. I will say that the girls that she has opened up to have been a tremendous blessing. They are wonderful with her and are a bright spot in her life. I am very thankful for them as they make Sarah feel like just another girl.

Sarah is involved in horseback riding lessons which she does about twice a month. It is breathtaking to see her up on the horse. I love watching her put the saddle on before riding and then taking the saddle off and brushing Bow down after her lesson. It is really cool to watch her use her hands to see. It is really actually quite amazing.

It is also amazing to watch her at gymnastics. She brings her cane into the gym with her now - which is something she was too shy to do at first - but after a couple of mishaps of being left alone without any guidance as to where the class was going to she decided it was best if she brought her cane in with her so that she could try and find them in the event that her class left her again. I love watching her on all of the different apparatus. I also love that the gym requires Sarah to have the same level of mastery on each apparatus in order for her to be able to move up to the next level. I know that it is so much harder for Sarah to master these skills, but I think she will be so proud of herself once she is able to realize that she earned her way up just as any other girl did. I don't want her to live her life expecting special treatment - the gym feels that way too.

Braille is coming along and Sarah is excited to be able to read on her own one day too. If we are still here when she is able to read Braille fluently there is a school for the blind about an hour away that offers a library of books all in braille. Sarah found out that they have Baby-Sitter Club books there and she is itching to be able to read one on her own. I know that she misses reading very, very much.

As always, please keep Sarah in your thoughts and prayers. Please pray that her MRI shows positive healing instead of the spread of disease. Please pray that the clinical trials going on now to restore myelin are successful because if they are then there is a real hope that someday Sarah will be able to see again with her own eyes. What a true miracle that would be. It is something her Dad and I wish for so much.

A Solution For Managing It All

The things in my life that currently take up the most time are: eating well & managing that darn food budget, keeping my house clean, and homeschooling the kiddos. I find that I cannot do all 3 as well as I would like to do in the allotted 24 hour period I am given each day, but I know that each area is important to me and I would like to find a compromise that will allow me to accomplish all three without losing my mind.

School work is # 1 during the school year. I don't want my kids to grow up and not be able to function well in this world. I know that there are some people out there who would greatly criticize the way that I homeschool because they would call it "schooling at home" - which just means that I take what they would have been doing in a traditional school setting and have them do it at home with me. Book work - others might call it. This is just the way that I roll. I have temporarily tried other methods of homeschooling such as unschooling or child led learning, but those methods just don't sit right with me. I think that they are wonderful ways to learn for other families who choose to go that route, but it is just not the way that I think is best for my family. I initially wanted to do school for 3 weeks on and 1 week off year round. The problem is that the kids and I got into a pretty good groove and I never took that second 3 week period off which threw everything out of whack. Which threw everything else (food and housework) out of whack too.

Because of this, my house is picked up but has dust bunnies under the couch the size small rodents. The floors need to be scrubbed down in earnest. The refrigerator needs to be scoured. And so on...

The grocery budget needs to become just that again...a budget. Right now I am afraid to look at what I have spent this month. Although, with me actually taking care of myself and watching what I eat (which in turns means that I am watching extra carefully what everyone else is eating) I am slowly taming the budget once again.

One of the reasons (and there were several) that I chose the 3 weeks on / 1 week off method was that it would allow me, in the off week, to scrub my house down. This meant that each and every month my house would be deep cleaned from the ceilings down to the floors and everything in between. The weeks that we were schooling would just be spent on the everyday chores such as sweeping, vacuuming, and wiping down the bathrooms.

So, my solution for trying to manage it all is this: don't try to manage it all at one time. (Please keep in mind that some of you may be amazing at managing it all, and if you are please write a book that I can purchase so that I can figure out how to do it as well and still keep my sanity.) By not trying to get it all done at once I will be more effective in getting it all done over time than if I tried to get it all done at the same time, but half-assed. (I am not sure I should be saying that word, but it fit so I am going to use it.) Does that make any sense?

(Photo courtesy of: harborathletic.com)

This week  we are taking off from school. The kids were excited that I was going to allow them the week off and follow my original schedule. (Another reason I use the 3 week on method is that their school schedule is intense and this allows them a week off once a month to just chill and recharge.)  The girls have been playing all morning and the boys have been creating a Minecraft world (on paper because I won't let them play online right now). There is a feeling of relaxation in the air. It is nice.

In just a few minutes I am going to crank up the music and mix up some of my homemade cleaning solutions and begin to clean my first zone. I created a cleaning schedule that breaks the house down into 5 zones. I needed to this so as not to overwhelm myself. This way when I am working on the house my one week out of the month I can still operate my day-to-day life while also getting the housework done. If I didn't do it this way I would either clean like a psycho nut for 2 days on end and become a crabby gorzilla or I would become overwhelmed by the amount of space I needed to clean and not do anything at all.

The zones look like this:

Zone A: My room, Elizabeth's room, Sarah's room, and the boy's room. (The girls days of sharing a room were quite short lived.)

Zone B: Master bathroom, main bathroom, casita bathroom, and the kitchen.

Zone C: Computer desk area, hallway 1, cedar closet, laundry room, hallway 2

Zone D: Dining room, family room, living room

Zone E: Music room, school room, play room


Since Wednesday's are my busiest days of the week I am making that my light day of cleaning. Tuesday's are my easiest day of the week because we have nothing going on, so I loaded on the chores that day.

So, there it is. My master plan...now let's see how well I follow it.

(Photo courtesy of: trentrenshawndrum.com)

204 & An Action Plan

(Photo courtesy of pinterest.)

Ever since I put this post out there I have been thinking a lot about my health. Questions such as: Is health more than weight? Is being healthy more than what I put into my mouth and how much I exercise? Is my weight struggle more than just a calories in and a calories out issue?

The answer to all of these questions is a resounding YES!!!!

I know that there are those of you who are struggling with the same issues because some of you contacted me regarding those issues. I know we hear each other loud and clear.

Some of the greatest things about myself are that I am completely stubborn, unrelenting, and unwilling to give up (long term) on something once I set my mind to it. What this means for an all or nothing girl like myself is that I will go balls to the wall trying to lose weight, have a bad day or two, fall off of the horse, gain the weight back, wait a while, and then try again. I have done this over and over and over again. Now, some might see this as a negative quality, but I am choosing not to look at it from that vantage point. Because here I sit ready to get back on the healthy horse again, and I need to remember that even though I may fail I also may succeed. That in itself is worth trying again for.

What matters to me is that, yes, I have fallen off of the bandwagon more times than I can remember, but I am willing to dust myself off and try again and again.

Here's the thing:  I don't know if my goals toward health are going to work out this time. I may be writing another post in a year saying the same things. This certainly isn't the first post I have written about trying to get healthy. But what I do know is that if I keep on trying and am kind to myself during this process, and am forgiving towards myself, and most importantly, loving towards myself I think I will have a much better chance at success than if I wasn't kind, or forgiving, or loving towards myself.

(Photo courtesy of: goodreads.com)

So, what am I going to do about my health?

Here is my action plan:

Spiritually: 

I am going to keep attending church every Sunday. 

I am going to continue to grow in my faith as much as I can each and every day.

Emotionally: 

I am going to take a step back when I feel myself getting stressed out. Take a 10 minute break (or whatever amount of time I feel is necessary) to regroup and refocus.

 I love to journal, so I will journal when I feel a calling to do that. 

Physically:

I am going to walk with the dogs 5 days a week. 

I am going to do 25 sit ups 5 days a week. 

I am going to lift weights 2 days a week.

I am also going go back to a plant based diet. 

Being a vegan really spoke to me for a lot of reasons and when I choose to only consume plant based foods I feel so much better in every aspect of my well being: spiritually, emotionally, and physically. 

I know that this road is not going to be perfect, but I am going to remember to be kind, forgiving, and loving to myself just as I would be to anyone else in my life that is going on a journey such as this. 

Every day is a new day. A new beginning. Maybe next year I won't be writing to you about how I am going to lose weight. Maybe next year I am going to be writing to you about how I am a less stressed out woman whose faith is stronger than ever who weights 65 lbs less than she did on August 22, 2015. Only time will tell...

Photo courtesy of: streadystrength.com

Judgement

The news of Josh Duggar's latest scandal has me really bummed. The initial news of his first scandal had me stunned for days. I was in disbelief. I loved watching 19 Kids and Counting. I loved watching Michelle and Jim Bob interact with each other. I loved how they seemed to interact with their kids. I thought the show was pretty wholesome. Sure, there were some ideas that they presented that did not sit right with me, but overall I was an avid viewer. My kids loved the show too. 

And now here we are. The mudslinging has begun in earnest this time dividing us even further. There are those that say that Josh is just a wayward soul who needs rehabilitation. There are others who shout that Josh is a hypocrite who stood in judgement of others (namely homosexuals) and now needs to stand in judgement himself. 

I get both sides.  

We all judge. We judge all the time. From simple things such as what our favorite color is or our favorite outfit. We judge the more complex things such as the way other people parent or whom they choose to love. We judge ourselves. 

But does the fact that we do this, both to ourselves and to others, make it right?  I do not think so. And in fact, I think that our judgement of others is a great sin. The bible is pretty specific about judgement:

“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye." (Matthew 7:1-5)

And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her." (John 8:7)

These verses apply to us all. They apply to Josh Duggar, and those like him, who shout about the immorality of homosexuality while they themselves sin. They apply to the homosexuals that people like Josh Duggar stand against because even if you do not believe that homosexuality is a sin, surely those who have an attraction to the same sex have committed other sins. My sins are too many to count just as, I am sure, yours are too.  

This whole issue is bigger than straight verse gay. Adulterer verse non-adulterer.  It is about judgement. I am in no position, nor is any man, to judge you for your sins (no matter what they may be) because I myself am a sinner. God doesn't differentiate between sins. He says that my sins are just as bad as your sins. If anything, I think I will be judged more harshly for my sins because as a Christian I know better!

Whether you are a homosexual, adulterer, liar, one who covets, takes the Lord's name in vain, etc...those are sins are between you and God. I may not agree with what you are doing - just as you may not agree with what I am doing, but who am I to throw stones at you when I am not without sin myself?

Do not grumble against one another, brothers, so that you may not be judged; behold, the Judge is standing at the door. (James 5:9)

A Birthday Girl & A Fashion Show Too!

Elizabeth celebrated her 9th birthday today. Nine! How can it be that my youngest child just turned nine? There is nothing like a birthday to show you that  time does truly move forward. Elizabeth began her day with Bob and I taking her to Dunkin' Donuts. After our bagels & donuts we headed home where she opened her presents. Along with clothes and money she received some Barbie clothes, a wallet, some lip gloss, Milk Duds, and Berenstain Bear books.

She asked to go to Target to spend some of her birthday money wheres she ended up purchasing a new Lego set. She went home, set up her Legos and played with Sarah who also purchased her own Legos (and with some verbal directions did a fine job of putting her Legos all by herself).

We then went to dinner at the Olive Garden, a familiar favorite of the kids. and a reminder of Ohio. After dinner we took her to Hastings (we always think of you, Tina) where she bought a new version of her favorite book: Little Women . Finally, we went to Hobby Lobby where she picked up some crafts.

We came home, broke the pinata, and ate cake.

She had a good day for sure!

Happy Birthday, Miss Elizabeth!!!

We are in so much trouble. 

Poor Lily....

Some afternoon arrivals...

We had an amazing sunset tonight. 

When It Doesn't Go The Way You Planned: A Soccer Story

We all know the saying, "When one door closes another opens.". What happens though if one door closes because it is a test to see how badly you want what is held behind that door?

After two months of practice (sometimes two times a day) 4 days a week Andy found out last night that he did not make the high school soccer team. All hope may not be lost though because he still may have a shot at earning a spot on the team mid-season. How? I asked the same question myself...

Apparently, some of the kids who made the team do not have the grades to officially play so as of right now they can come to practice and suit up for games, but cannot play in them. Once they prove that they have gotten their grades up (I am assuming after a month of so of school?) then they can officially become members of the team. If they do not get their grades up then they are off of the team which would give Andy a chance to be asked to join it.

I really like and respect the high school coach. He was honest with the kids all summer about what he was looking for. He told the boys that effort and hard work were not enough to make it. You had to have skill and most importantly you had to have heart.  He told the boys face to face in small groups who made it and who got cut and more importantly, why they got cut. Andy was told that the coaches could not find a place that seemed to fit him on the field - which I agree with wholeheartedly. He seemed lost often times when playing in scrimmages and did not have the confidence in himself to play the new positions such as defense that he was asked to try out. He also struggled to lead the team as a midfielder - which is what this coach likes to have his midfielders do. The coach told Andy that he loved the way Andy was willing to play any position he was asked to and that he did not ever put up a fuss. He told Andy that he was still welcome to practice with the team and to try and find a spot where he felt he could excel at on the field. If he is able to do this and an opening becomes available then he may asked to join the JV team mid season.

Andy's response was classic Andy. He told me with a fierce determination that he was going to go the practices and show the coach that he belonged on the team. He was going to work extra hard and prove that he is worthy to be one of the 22  boys wearing a uniform. He was disappointed in himself that he let his lack of confidence ruin his game, but he is willing to work on that so that he can improve as a player. (Where was this attitude all summer?! This is what the coach needed to see!)

I am proud of him. As much as I wanted Andy on the team I agreed with the coach's decision to cut him. If a player does not believe in himself how can he expect his teammates to believe in him? If a player doesn't have heart and just seems to be going through the motions why would you want to offer him a coveted spot? Andy played like a kid who seemed like he had never seen a soccer ball some of the time. And then every so often he would play like the kids I knew who excelled under Coach Boorman in Ohio. (I think that that glimmer of talent and his great work ethic are what got him asked to continue practicing with the team.)

The only thing that irks me a bit about Andy being cut is that I don't feel that the kids who didn't have the grades to play should have made the team at all. (According to what Andy heard from the boys some of them do not have the grades to play right now, but still made the team anyway.) I think it sends the wrong message to these boys that even though the coaches/teachers/administrators tell you if you don't make grades you cannot play for the team, and yet these same boys make the team, but just cannot play in the games. It doesn't really add up. The message and the actions seem off.  Part of me thinks that it is done this way down here because if a lot of these boys weren't into sports they would end up getting into trouble, and so exceptions are made for them. On the one hand, I agree because Andy has other things to keep him out of trouble plus he has a good home life and a good head on his shoulders. Some of these boys don't have that at all. If making a team and having to come to practices will keep them out of trouble, then so be it. On the other hand though, I feel that if you don't have the grades you should not make the team. Period. I don't think that kids who do have the grades should be cut if there is another player that didn't make grades.

I truly think that Andy will make the team at some point while we are down here.There were an awful lot of seniors on the team (between 12-14). There are not that many juniors and sophomores, so when these seniors graduate there will be more room for kids like Andy to make it.  Back in Ohio, a buddy of the boys tried out for the middle school team some time ago and did not make it. (I was shocked, but that is a  whole other story.) Instead of letting that rejection keep him from the game he loves he kept on playing and ended up trying out for the same middle school team a year later. And you know what? He made it! Andy and I have talked about that young man's dedication and love for the same sport that Andy says he has. If he truly loves the game, then he will not let this closed door deter him from it he will just work harder and try again next year. Just like his buddy did.

I am thankful that Andy will still get to practice with the high school team. Because we live in the middle of no where when high school ball is in play in the fall there are no other teams that Andy can join. The competitive team that Andy tried out for (and we still do not know if he made that yet) does not pick up until November after high school ball is over. The second club in town does not offer teams above U13. Finally, the recreational team won't have any teams (that I am aware of) for the same reasons that the Rio Rapids does not have teams - all of the boys are playing for their high schools.

The sting of failure is a hard deal with sometimes. I am glad that Andy is going through this experience. Situations like these will help prepare him for the disappointments that crop up from time to time in adult life. I know that he will handle those so much better because of the disappointments he has faced in his youth. I am so very, very proud of him - I cannot stress that enough. I am proud of him for sticking these summer soccer sessions out even when they hurt him so badly physically and mentally that he would come to me crying about how hard it was. I am proud of him for sticking with soccer this summer even when his feelings got hurt because he was picked last out of  all the kids for a scrimmage. I am proud of him for not giving up or giving in even when every part of his being was trying to convince him otherwise.  That takes true grit. I don't know too many adults that would have stuck it out the way he did.

It is times like these when he grinds it out when I am reminded just how blessed I am that God picked me to be his mother for I learn just as much from him as he does from me. We will see where this closed door now leads him. He may push it back open or he may decide to leave it closed forever. Only time will tell.

Managing It All

Finding a balance can be very tricky for me. I really have to work at it because I am an all or nothing kinda girl. I am pretty sure that I am not alone in this boat. Whether you are a mama and work full time or are a mama and own a business or a mama who is taking care of someone who is ill or are a mama who homeschools, etc...life can be one great big balancing act.

For me, what I am struggling to balance is homeschooling, food, and housework. All three of those things combined would take more hours than I have in a day to do them the way that  would like to. This week we have been focusing hard on school and housework which means that food has gone by the wayside. This means that I haven't been tracking our expenses which means that I have probably spent more than I should have these first two weeks of August. I will write a post about that in the next couple of days once I am brave enough to see the damage done to my bank account.

One thing that I am trying to work very hard on (and am having some success with this week) is just trying to slow down and remember that I can accomplish everything that I want to just not all at one time. Because school work is a priority in this house that comes first. The order this week has then been housework and finally food. (We are still eating healthy I am just not paying attention to cost like I should.)

Instead of cleaning my house like a nut I try to make sure that it is picked up each day. Then I have decided that the kids and I are going to tackle a housework job each day. For example, this week every morning after the kids have gotten up they had to go outside and pick 10 weeds from the yard. I also did/do this after my morning walk with the dogs. (I decided last weekend that I was going to start walking again in order to slowly try and get myself healthier. Wednesday and Sunday are my rest days, but every other day I have been /will be outside taking a brisk walk with the four legged beasts in my home.) I also assigned each of the kids 3 windows to wash (inside and outside) each day. I included myself in that assignment as well. The kids and I were able to accomplish these tasks in a minimal amount of time over the course of the week and it didn't cause me any stress at all. It was much different than my normal approach at deep cleaning or weeding which is to go balls to the wall by myself until I get the whole job done which usually takes me a couple of days from the time I get up to the time I go to bed. This makes me an exhausted and irritable mama and wife.

Housework is cyclical. It is just going to get dirty again once I clean it up, so why go crazy cleaning  it like a mad woman? Why not just do a little bit each day and keep my stress levels low and just know that I will be doing this every day for the foreseeable future?

Now I just need to figure out how to get the food thing figured out. Shopping for two weeks didn't really work for me. I think (and again I will have to check the numbers) that I ended up spending more than I wanted to by running to get the fruits and veggies that I needed during the course of those two weeks. I am going to give it another try though because I think that part of the problem is that my dedication to the project was not where it should have been.

I am not going to stress out about finding a balance with my three big focal points. I am just going to pray each morning that God will lead me in wisdom and serenity. It has worked so far this week, and I trust that it will continue to do so.

Finishing Up Braille

Sarah has finished up learning her Braille alphabet yesterday. She does a great job on the braille writer (which is just a typewriter for blind persons). She is doing a pretty good job reading it as well. It will take some time to become proficient, but she will accomplish it for certain.

Once we have learned the alphabet proficiently she will then move on to something called contracted braille which is what most books are written in as it would take too long to write a book using each individual braille letter. Contracted braille is just where a combination of the 6 cells equal a word instead of a letter. (You can see below for an example.)

It will take us quite a long time to learn braille proficiently. I was given the estimate of about 2 years by a teacher for the blind. We are about 6 months in and the estimate that we were given seems about right.

Sarah misses reading more than anything which keeps her motivated to keep moving forward even when she gets stuck or frustrated when she gets stuck on a letter.

We will get through this little by little. I will not lie though - every time we work on Braille I say a little prayer that someday she won't need this anymore because she will be reading with her own eyes again.

Courtesy of: google.com

Sarah has learned all of these letters and in approximately another month will be able to read them proficiently. 

Courtesy of: google.com

This is what we will be moving on to next and will take up the bulk of our time. 

Shhhh...Don't Tell Her!

The little girl above, my baby (if God's see fit), is going to be 9 on Monday. 9! How on earth did all of those years pass?!  Anyway, usually when the kids have a birthday I just throw things together kinda last minute. Their birthdays seem to creep up on me every year because of the hustle and bustle of our lives, but this year for this child I paid attention to the calendar and have planned a fabulous day doing the things that I know that she will love to do. 

Because parenting Elizabeth is so hard and has been from the day she came into this world I don't think I tell her enough or show her enough just how special she is to me.  I want to change that and I thought that a special birthday would be just the kick start I need. 

During the sermon on Sunday our pastor told us that 80% of what comes out of our mouths as parents is negative. I was floored. But when I really got to thinking about it that number sounds about right. I write great things on my blog and on Facebook about how special my kids are and how wonderful they are, but I don't often, if ever, tell them that. How crazy is that?! 

They need to hear those words of affirmation from me. They need to know I am proud of them and I think that they are great human beings. That I love them with every ounce of my being. 

Why not kick start my personal challenge to praise my kids more by having a party? A party for the girl who probably receives my praise the least. 

I have been storing the things that I know that she will really like as gifts in my mind for the last few months. Sarah and I are going to go shopping this weekend for her gifts. We are going to pick out her favorite candy for our annual pinata. We are going to decorate the house with as much bling as possible. I want to bedazzle her with birthday bling so when we go to the mall to shop (which she loves to do) for some of her birthday gifts everyone will know that it is her special day. 

My mom tried to always make our birthdays matter. She worked hard to make those days special. And it worked because I may not remember a ton about them, but I do remember her effort and the love she put into them. Even though my children are older I would like to begin making them feel as valued and loved on their special days as I did on mine. 

On Monday, when Elizabeth opens her eyes I cannot wait to see her smile. I cannot wait to shower her with attention and love all day long. She deserves it. She is definitely one special kid.