Catching Up

 I always intend to keep up in this space and then - life happens. I know some day in the near future I am going to kick myself for not writing down so many of these moments that pass by without noting them here. Since there is nothing I can do about the past, I might as well just focus on writing this note and not fret about how I may or may not feel in the future. 

There has been a lot going on here which is part of the reason the space of time that lapses between posts ebbs and flows.

 Bobby began a new job today with a competitor of his previous employer. The whole experience has been very bittersweet as both Bobby and I thought that he would retire from his old employer. He started with that company when he was 20-years-old and slowly worked his way up the ladder. He was gunning for one last move, but it just never worked out despite assurances from a dozen plus people saying otherwise. It was incredibly hard for me to watch my husband be told time and time again that he was ready for the next position, that it would happen to him in time, that all it took was one 'yes', that he should keep on trying because his turn was just around the corner, etc...I began to plant the seed for Bobby to look for another employer in 2020. He has a Masters Degree, is highly rated each year when review time comes around, has won countless internal awards - the latest one being in 2021, and is very experienced in his field. He wanted to hang on a bit longer because he believed in the people running his previous company more than I did. He felt for sure that this company that he has grown up with and sacrificed things for would surely deliver on its promises. By the fall of 2021, he knew this was not the case with a series of heart-breaking business decisions that left him without the desired promotion. The final nail in the coffin was when he was temporarily asked to fill the role he was seeking and then train the external person who actually got the job. He began looking for another job at the end of January in 2022, after all, there is only so much a person can take. He ended up being pursued by several competitors once he put himself out there and ended up choosing one of them. This new employer has a good culture - a good vibe - something his previous employer was sorely lacking. It is also paying him a hell of a lot more and the benefits are better, so we really lucked out. We thankful for this new opportunity, but I wish that it didn't have to end the way it did with his previous employer. I am happy that Bobby is with a company that clearly values him. In my mind, he was taken advantage of for so long, I think he forgot what it feels like to be truly valued in an employment setting. I think the biggest take-away I learned from this experience is to never be loyal to a large company because all it cares about is its bottom line and not its individual people. Do a good job and be honest in your work, but always be looking out for ways of bettering yourself and checking your value on the open market. It was something that we weren't doing because we believed that the company would take care of us, but in the end that did not happen. I am excited for our new future. Bobby is pumped and inspired, and it is nice to see. His new employees are going to love him. 

My boys are still in Ohio for the summer. Each is working his own job. Joshua is working as a lifeguard at a pool he used to go to each summer when he was a little kid. It must feel like he has come full circle. Lifeguarding suits him. He has a good personality for that line of work. He is going to the gym quite a bit too in hopes that he stays as fit as possible for the soccer season which will be starting up again on August 4th.  He is staying with his best friend's family and is living his best life doing all of the things that 20-year-old boys of this generation do. Andy is staying with his cousins for the summer. He is working for his 18-year-old cousin, who is an amazing entrepreneur and owns his own landscaping business, and from what I understand, is doing quite well for himself. It has been pretty cool to watch this young man's success from afar. Some people just that that 'it' factor when it comes to entrepreneurship, and this young man is clearly one of them. Andy is having a good time just being away from home and being on his own for the first time. He is finding his way in this world and that is good to see. I am happy he is working outside and getting some fresh air each day. The boys hang out occasionally, but for the most part are each doing their own things while in Ohio. They aren't exactly sure when they are coming back to NC, but I am hoping it will be before August, so that I can spend time with them both before school picks back up again.

My girls are doing good. We are still working on schoolwork and will be doing so until the middle of July(ish). They are quite over it, but we have to meet the state's homeschooling laws and because we didn't start our school year until after Labor Day and need to complete a 36-week schedule we are finishing up the second week in July. (We are making up three weeks of unexpected time off and normally would have finished towards the end up June with a Labor Day week start date.) We are undecided about when we want to begin the next school year. We were talking about doing so the 1st of August, so that we can finish in May which will give the girls extra time to be together before Sarah heads off to college that September, but I am not sure that our school weary minds can handle only a two-week summer break. We'll have to see though because we really don't mind working through the summer here as it is so hot. We would rather have some extra time off in the fall when it is amazingly beautiful, and all of the public-school kids are back in school to take the time and head out on some trips. We'll see. 

Sarah just went on her first college visit this past weekend. She is looking at three in-state schools now as NC subsidizes college for its residents and state colleges are very affordable. She was eyeing New Mexico State University for a while, but I am not sure she feels that comfortable being that far away from us even with friends there who would watch over her closely. It was surreal to be on a college campus knowing that in 15 months Sarah will be attending one. I would be lying if I said that I was not nervous as hell, but I also know that Sarah can do this. I have no doubt that, if she really wants to live on campus somewhere, she absolutely can do it. It would be a huge step for her, but by working with her O & M tutor each week she is getting closer and closer to becoming more independent. You can see the growth she has made in the 6 months we have been working with Jana; I just know her growth will multiply exponentially by the time she would need to go off to college. 

Elizabeth is still painting a lot and doing her own thing. She is lonely and is trying desperately to meet people her age, but it is hard. She is involved in several groups (a choir, soccer team, and youth group) and we will be introducing her to one more in late July (a homeschool, high school basketball team), but even with that exposure to kids her age it is still hard for her to find her tribe. I think she is also feeling pressure because she knows that Sarah is leaving in a little over a year. I think that she is panicking that she will have absolutely no one once Sarah leaves. I keep encouraging her to keep trying. Her tribe is out there, but when you are a 15-year-old girl it is sometimes hard to have the patience to wait for them to show up. I think that this lack of friendship is the hardest, worst part about all of the moves we have made. All of the kids suffered through that because we were moving every two years for the past 8 years - trying to find friend groups as teenagers is so hard; Trying to do so every two years is almost impossible. 

As for me, I have been doing okay. I have had some health issues pop up in the last few weeks and have been working on resolving those. I have come to realization that if I am going to live to be 107 (which I made the decision to do when I was 7 years old because I wanted to be around to celebrate the Statue of Liberty's 300th birthday - don't ask me where this idea came from) then I have to stop putting myself last for once and for all. So, I am working on that. It is going to take several months to fix what I need to fix as there are several issues going on, but I am confident that it will happen. I am committed to putting in the time and effort to do so, otherwise I won't live to be 107. 

Whew! And that is where we are at.