I love homeschooling. It fits our family so well right now. Granted, I have lived enough of a life to know that I cannot guarantee that this is something that we will do forever. I am taking things one year at a time, one child at a time. Right now would I like to say that this is something I could see myself doing for the rest of the kids school years? Absolutely. But, I also know that sometimes life changes or leads us down paths we didn't expect which results in decisions being made that we never thought we would be making. Therefore, I try to live year by year with something as monumental as homeschooling.
Elizabeth is learning to read, and I am thankful that her kindergarten class last year taught her so much in the way of the basics of reading. We are flying through her curriculum, and I am no longer worried that I won't be able to teach her to read. This was one of my biggest fears. I tried to teach the boys to read the first time I homeschooled them, many years ago, and failed in a very epic way. Years later that memory still haunts me, and I was really worried that I was going to make the same mistake with Elizabeth. I don't think I have to worry about that this time around. I have a great reading program that we are using, and all seems to be going well.
We have been spending an inordinate amount of time out of doors which I very much love. We are spending our days mostly hiking through the trails provided by the area around us, but the kids have also been spending quite a bit of time outside in our yard playing soccer with each other. I have decided to invest in some warm and high quality winter supplies (boots, snow pants, hats, gloves) because I would like us to be able to spend a good deal of time out of doors in the winter too. It has been so good for all of us to get out as frequently as we do, and I find myself cherishing these memories we are making very much.
Being out in the woods also helps me to think about a lot of the things that are on my mind. One of the biggest things that I am pondering is how much of what I am trying to teach the kids is really useful? For example, I am currently working on grammar with the boys that is going over prepositions, simple subjects, predicates, etc...I find myself relearning the information because I haven't used that stuff since the day I took my last test on it in school. Is this type of information really relevant? How many of you could identify what the predicate is of a sentence or what the verb phrase is? I know that I couldn't before I relearned those topics. Am I wasting the kids time filling their heads (temporarily, as I am sure that they too will forget it) with this information? Is there stuff out there that is more important and useful to learn? And if there is, am I willing to abandon some of the more conventional ways of learning in order to be able to pursue that information? I am not sure of the answers yet. The jury is still out on those questions. What I do know, is that while it makes me feel good to be able to say that we got through 'x' number of lessons this week in each subject I am not sure that it is working out for the kids. I find myself wondering just how far I am willing to go away from the traditional methods of learning (i.e. textbooks, tests, papers, etc...) in order to teach my kids the joy of learning. I also find myself reevaluating my reasons for homeschooling the kids. Am I doing so just to get them away from the rubbish that exists in the school system? Am I doing so to give them a "better" (I use that term loosely because I am not sure what 'better' really is right now) education than what I perceive them to be getting in school? Am I doing so to allow them to explore interests and ideas that they would not be able to pursue in the public school system? I think that the reasons that I set out on this homeschooling journey with the kids have changed, and what I originally thought were my reasons now might not seem as relevant. I don't know...right now I just feel like I (and our family) are going through a metamorphosis. What we believed in and who were were just a couple of months ago is slowing changing and transforming into something new and different. I am enjoying this process immensely, and can feel tremendous positive growth in all of us.
We definitely have our own little thing going on here. I have stepped back from society at large and rarely see anyone or talk to anyone outside of my immediate family. The kids too, seem to be doing the same thing. Anytime I ask them if they want to go and play with so-and-so they all seem to give the same answer - they would rather just stay at home hanging out with their siblings. (This is not to say that they never go anywhere. They just don't seem to be going out nearly as often as they once did.)I have thought a lot about this, and wonder why we are all so focused on each other, and no longer have the urge to be away from our nest in the company of others. I think that the answer is that there is a season and time for everything (or so the bible says), and I find that to be true. Right now, our time is focused on one another. In another season, we will all spread out again and focus on the relationships outside of our family. It's not that we will never hang out with people again, or that we are all hermits and will decline any invitation to be with other people. It's just that we have been through so much in the past year that it feels right to regroup and focus on one another as a family. After all, our motto is: Family first - always.
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