As we prepare to begin moving things around tomorrow morning my thoughts keep coming back to how to use the space we have effectively. I want a warm, vibrant home that utilizes its space well while seeming spacious at the same time. I have friends who are amazing at making their homes look like the inside of an interior design magazine (I am talking about you Stacy and Conor), so I know that it is possible to create this type of space, but truth be told I am terrible at creating that kind of look myself. I just don't have that natural ability to look at a room and to know right off of the bat what will make it appear homey and hip and cool while also coming across as completely functional space. For those of us out there that lack the interior designer eye this is where the library and Pinterest can come in handy. So, that is what I have been doing. Slowly but surely I have been 'pinning' ideas that I really, really like and will go through each of them to determine which I can implement in my home. I have also been bookmarking library books with paper clips, so that when I am able the family and I can decide which ideas to keep and which ones to scrap.
We do know that we want to bring color into our home. We know that we want to focus on creative learning spaces and reading. Along those lines we are thinking crafts, music, arts, blocks, etc...We want comfortable reading areas with good lighting. We want a functional kitchen that is open and airy. We want a dedicated space for eating our meals by candlelight. I envision a wall in our home with chalkboard paint, so that we all have a place to draw on the walls and be creative. We also know that we want the kids to have a huge say in what we put in our home and where - especially in their rooms. It has been really nice to hear them vocalize their opinions in regards to this. These 1120 square feet that reside within these walls are a home for our family, and it should be the family that has a say. It's funny because after our house came off of the market and the whole family was involved in a group discussion about our house ideas one of the kids, I think it was Sarah, said that she felt like this home was a new home. She mentioned that the way she viewed this space was new, and that she felt that this would be a brand new home for us once the changes were completed. I couldn't agree more. Perspective seems to be the theme of the year for me, and once again it showed itself to be true. A house that I couldn't wait to get out of 6 months ago is now the house I couldn't imagine moving from now. Nothing about the house changed except my perception of it, but that one change was enough to make all of the difference in the world.
One of the hardest things for us to determine is going be deciding which of our belongings stay and which is donated. We cleared out the house when we put it on the market, but those items have just been in boxes stored away. We now have to go through everything both in the storage area and in our home and decide which fits our family values and which is something that needs to be left out of the house. I think that this project will be just as hard for me as for the kids. As a parent I want to be able to provide my kids with stuff. That is what this country is based on, right? Bigger houses, bigger cars, bigger vacations, bigger paychecks. More toys, more gadgets, more, more, more. That is the message that we receive every day. And a good majority of us buy into that lie. I know I do. I struggle all of the time with not bringing junk into our home as a way to show my kids I love them. All of my kids have way more stuff than they need - WAY more. How much of this crap did they really need? If I am being honest - I would venture to say that 90% of what they have just collects dust or gets stepped on by me as move from one thing to the next. 90% of the items in our home are not needed. That is a whole lot of stuff. Besides that, how much value do these items really add to our lives? If they are collecting dust then they are just taking up valuable space that I do not have a lot of to begin with. It is going to be a hard few days making decisions about letting go of some of personal effects. It won't be hard because we will miss the items themselves, but rather because we have bought into the notion that we need all of those items. Those things that collect dust and sit unused are the very things that I cling to because they make me feel, in some ways, more secure. We all like having stuff because we are told (by companies that make money off of us buying their stuff) that having more junk is good for us. Having more junk makes us feel better (not) and makes our lives easier (not).
I just finished up reading a book about the Amish and their farming practices, and I couldn't help but think about how much fulfillment many of them seem to have from living on so much less than I do. They have simple homes filled with only what they need, and they seem happy. They don't have a bazillion pieces of clothing, or the latest technological gadgets, or a million toys. They have just enough. Now, I am not saying that my family is going to become Amish, but what I am saying is that so much of what I have in my home is influenced by what I see on TV, in magazines, and by what others have. I used to think that the "best" homes were the ones that had completely matching furniture and every decorative piece was just right, but my vision has changed (as has so much in my life) and I no longer see that house as the house for me.I want a simple home. I want a home where I have just enough of what I need - not what others tell me I need, but what I know in my heart I need. I want a home that is cozy and inviting - you know what I am talking about. We all do. It is the home that when we walk into it we feel a collective sigh and a warm hug embrace our hearts as we enter the front door. A home that beckons us to stay just a little bit longer. A home with a homemade meal and comfortable places to sit. A home with laughter and color and light, and most importantly - love. That is the kind of home I am going to spend the next several months building. That, my friends, is the home for me. I am so excited to take you on this journey with me.
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