Sarah has been hospitalized again. She lost vision in both of her eyes (again), and is having a hard time getting it back. So much for having a peaceful beginning of summer vacation. I don't want to talk about the details right now, it seems like I have been explaining the same story over and over again to doctors and nurses, and I am just too tired to begin that book again. Just know that we thought we treated her vision issues in her right eye, and were working on getting things back on track with her left eye, when this weekend she lost vision in both again. Same pattern as last time. Black dots followed by blurriness, then eye pain, then eye pain gone, then large black dot, then hardly any vision at all.
I am not angry anymore. This our life now, and I must make the best of it. I have been showing Sarah how to use her hands to help her see. How to feel things, so that her fingers can become her eyes. The doctors are hopeful that her vision will indeed come back, but there is something in the pit of my stomach warning me to be cautious of that hope. It is not a pessimistic feeling, just an ominous feeling - if that even makes any sense.
I am home tonight, and it feels good to be so. Except for a few hours I have not been home since Monday morning, and I miss my home and my 3 other children terribly. Our family, once again, has risen to the occasion, and helped us out a bunch. Friends have also offered their support, and their generosity is very much appreciated.
I wish I had more for you all right now, but I just don't. I do not know when I will be able to blog again (it might be another week or so, or it could be this weekend, who knows?), but I do know that I long for the normalcy of writing about regular days. I will be in touch again as soon as I can.
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