More Than I Can Bear

Have you ever heard the saying, "God never gives you more than you can bear."?  I certainly have. In fact, it was something that I would tell myself often when I was facing a difficulty or trial even in those times when I wasn't sure God even existed. (Kinda funny, right?) In fact, my two favorite slogans were the one above and "This too shall pass.".

I don't think that it is accurate for me to tell myself that "God give me more than I can bear." because I think that he has and does give me more than I can bear because he doesn't want me to go it alone. God, I think, purposefully has presented me with trials and tribulations that have forced me to come to him because I could not carry the trial on my own. God doesn't want me to walk alone. He wants me to count on Him, to lean on Him in times of great happiness, but also in times of trouble.

For so long, because I am incredibly stubborn, I have tried to do it my way. I didn't need God's help (or so I thought) and I didn't want God's help because I was completely self sufficient. (Ha!) Instead of coming to Him willingly, as some of His children are want to do, I had to be broken first in order to truly be ready to submit to His will. The straw that broke me was, of course, Sarah's diagnosis.

I tried for so long to carry all of the emotions and feelings that I have surrounding her journey by myself. But it was too hard. After feeling hatred then anger towards God those feelings were replaced by extreme sadness and fear. Finally, those feelings turned into surrender. Having my daughter carry this monstrous disease in her body is something that I cannot carry alone. This is what finally turned me toward God.

Now I know that I no longer have to carry the big things or the little things that trouble me in this life all by myself. As long as I am willing to give up the control to God (and believe me this is not easy for me to do) my burden never will be more than I can bear. But should I try and stray off the course and go-it-alone? You better believe that my burdens will be too much for me to bear alone because burdens are not  meant to be carried solely by mere humans. They are meant to be given up to God.


I am weary and tired from trying to carry all that I have on my own. I am glad that I am no longer choosing to do so.