Figuring It All Out

This school week was tough to say the least. As I try to juggle allowing the kids to learn outside of textbooks my desire to have them learn using textbooks still has a huge pull on me. I like textbooks because then I can be sure that my kids are learning, but I am beginning to see where my desire to push and push them is backfiring - especially with Andy.

I am beginning to wonder how Andy did as well as he did in school because he is a partial hot mess at home. There are so many big things that he does not have a knowledge base for: multiplication tables, cursive writing, spelling of any sort. All of these things (okay, maybe minus the cursive writing) are a really big deal. How can he possibly handle the upper level math that he is doing (if he had gone back to public school he was selected to take an upper level math class this school year) that I purchased for him to do if he doesn't even know his multiplication tables?! So, we will be taking a break from his textbook work for the next few school days and we will be making fact cards to help him learn his multiplication tables. I find myself frequently exasperated by the things that he does not know, and I need to harness that feeling in a little bit because it is not fair to him. I don't know if maybe he is just trying to bamboozle me on some of these things so that he doesn't have to work as hard, or if he really does have these inadequacies (which I am beginning to think that the issue is more the latter than the former), but either way it is extremely frustrating. All I know is that I am growing increasingly disenchanted with our education system. I can see in my own children how inadequate and broken our system is, and it frightens me. I don't know what the solution is, but I do know that I am glad that I stepped away from it even if it ends up only being for a year.

One of the fun things about school is that the three younger kids asked to stay up later than normal last night to finish up today's work so that they could have the day off. So, Josh was up until 10 pm, and the girls were up until 9:30 finishing up their subject work for today. That kind of flexibility is amazingly awesome, and one of the advantages of homeschooling.  Andy is the only one who has work to do, but he worked pretty late into the night himself to get to a point where he only had a few things to do today. Everyone has worked super hard this week - the weekend could not have come at a better time.

Bob asked me the other night if I regretted bringing the kids home. I think he could see how hard and how long I was working with the kids each day, and was wondering if it was weighing too heavily on me. I didn't even have to think about that answer - the words just tumbled out of me - no, I do not regret bringing them home. Not for one second. Even though homeschooling them is very hard and time consuming at times it is the best decision that we have made as a family. Bringing them home works for us. It is one of those things that is right as rain. I am thankful that I live in a country that allows me the right to bring my children home to educate them.

As I figure out next week's schedule I will take the things that worked from this week and the things that did not work this week and make some changes to our goals. We will eventually get into the right rhythm of that I am certain.

On a different note - we have out first showing on Saturday, and I am super excited. I hope that the people who come through this house love it as much as we have. I hope that they see the potential in it to make many happy memories. If this house ends up not being for them that is okay too. It is just nice to have someone want to see it.